Forgetting the Pain
by KimDavenport
Summary: Evie thought she had been rid of the place. She had pushed it out of her life, and pushed it out of her mind. She finally felt healed. She finally felt safe. But Mal's return to the Isle of the Lost forces Evie to revist a painful past she would much rather left forgotten. Rated T for sadness, light depression


Evie sighed as she looked at Ben's lost face.

She knew she would regret this.

"Mal's gone back to the Isle of the Lost," she said carefully. "I can take you there. We can bring her back."

Ben looked up. There was hope shinning in his light blue eyes. And something else—love for Mal, maybe? He was definitely ecstatic about the thought of making it right, getting his love back again.

Evie felt a sense of happiness at helping her friend. She had grown so compassionate in her time here, and she loved seeing the looks of gratitude on others faces when she worked for them. She loved seeing how her clients' faces lit up when she showed them a brand –new ball gown, stitched perfectly to fit their frame.

This was how Ben looked now, overwhelmed with gratitude at her offer to help.

But, she had to make it clear-she needed his promise.

"But," she said carefully, holding his gaze. She stared into his eyes. "I need you to promise me something."

"Anything! Anything!" he exclaimed, too caught up in the joy of planning his reunion with his love to think to carefully about any request she might make. He was being far too flippant about this. She needed him to understand.

"I need you to promise me that I won't be stuck there."

Ben's face clouded with a moment of confusion. She assumed he had been expecting her to ask for something; such a request seemed out of place when she had already so well secured her place in Auradon.

"Of course," he said carefully. "Of course you won't be."

That was all fine and well to say, but she needed something more. She needed a promise.

"I need you to swear it to me," she said, trying to keep her voice calm and steady. She needed him to see how serious she was; how important this was to her. He had never been to the Isle, never seen its terrors. He was in for a shock. And she wanted to be sure he would make it a promise she would return.

"I swear it Evie. You will come back with the rest of us, and Mal. I won't let you get stuck there."

Evie took a deep breath and steadied herself. She had his word. A word of a king should be enough; shouldn't it? Still, she could feel her palms shaking as she removed them from his desk.

"Good. Then I will gather up supplies and get Jay and Carlos. We will leave in the limo as soon as possible."

Pulling herself up to her impressive height, she flounced out of the room and closed the door behind her.

The moment she was alone in the hallway, she covered her face with her hands and took and deep breath.

 _It will be fine._ She told herself. _It's just for a little while. And it's for Mal. You can do this for your best friend._

Then, she pushed herself away from the wall and continued down the hall, wobbling a bit on her unsteady legs.

The trembling didn't leave her as she found Jay and Carlos, prepared supplies, and waited for nightfall. As Ben drove the limo to the point where the magical bridge would form, her nervous mounted themselves into a spiraling cartwheel.

Ben pushed the button on his clicker and the golden bridge formed, a beacon in the night. Connecting the evil and good on a momentary branch of magic.

Evie couldn't watch as the dark Isle grew closer and closer. Settling herself farther back into the plush seat, she turned her head away from the window and kept her eyes averted to the floor.

"Are you okay?" Jay asked, leaning closer to her and whispering so only she could hear him.

Evie didn't trust herself to speak, so she only nodded.

The truth was, she wasn't okay. Returning now to the Isle of the Lost was one of the most painful things she had ever had to do. Living there had been one painful day after another. It hadn't seemed as bad at the time. She knew she didn't have it great, but she had it about the same as everyone else.

Now that she had escaped; that she had _healed_ , the pain seemed overwhelming. All of the memories, all of the horrible events that made this place into one of the biggest nightmares in the world flushed back over her as the car drove steadily into the black hole of pain awaiting them. It was like reopening a wound with a sharp knife. It cut deep, and she worried her feelings would spill over for all to see. She had to keep it together, keep strong, for Mal's sake.

When they arrived, Ben cut the engine and jumped out of the car first. His enthusiasm was so out of place for the Isle of the Lost that is actually scarred Evie a bit. They were more conservative as they stepped out of the limo. Jay and Carlos slipped right back into their Isle faces; peering around corners suspiciously, holding their pockets tightly, keeping a far distance between everyone else.

It scared Evie. And as they made their way through the town, it started to scare her even more. She did not seem to be able to transition back into her 'old self' as easily as the others. And as they made their way past a dark alleyway, two dirty little children managed to slip her wallet from her.

She never would have had that happen to her before. Maybe she really was losing her 'bad' touch. Or maybe she had just never had anything worth stealing before.

She tried to push it down. She tried to show Ben with a neutral face how to act like an insider. If someone recognized them and they got caught, their little escapade back down memory lane would be over. Furthermore, they wouldn't be able to get to Mal at all.

So she pushed it down and walked on. They made their way past so many hunched, haggard-looking faces. People who either had no soul left or had such a tarnished soul it seemed as good as gone.

Finally, they crept their way to the old flat.

"We'll wait here," whispered Jay as they paused below the stairs.

"All the way up to the top," added Carlos. "She'll be there."

Evie nodded her agreement. She saw what the boys were doing; giving Ben and Mal some much-needed time alone to talk. She just couldn't seem to wrench up the words to add her agreement. The fear was clutching her chest in a tight vice. It felt like the times when she was younger, before she had hardened to the corruption and evil in her homeland.

But she put on a strong face for Ben. As he looked to her for support, she smiled and nodded again. Encouraged, he turned his back on them and began to make his way up the stairs.

Once he was gone, they were all alone again. The air was cold and smoggy. Screaming could be heard in the distance, whether agony or malicious joy it was impossible to decipher.

Jay and Carlos and Evie stood all alone, shivering and trying to ignore the rush of memories pressing in on them.

Evie could feel a tightness closing around her. She didn't like this. At least when they had been walking they had been moving somewhere; as though they had a purpose and a goal to eventually leave this horror behind. At least when Ben had been with them she could focus on trying to protect him instead of protecting herself.

Now, she was all alone with her thoughts, her worries, her _pain_.

She could feel it all closing in. Was the air really becoming heavier? Why was the ground swaying so much?

In the distance, as though across a great ocean,. she could hear Jay's voice sounding concerned; "Are you okay Evie…"

She couldn't answer. She couldn't breath. The Fear. The memories. It was all too much…

"We'd better take her upstairs," said Carlos, suddenly sounding alarmed. "To the lower level.. there's a couch there she could lay on…"

Just then, Evie collapsed. If Jay's strong arms hadn't been so quick to grab her, she would have fallen onto the ground right then and there.

"I reckon you have a point there buddy," said Jay, nodding at Carlos. Quickly, Jay scooped up Evie's other half and jostled her up the stairs. He dumped her unceremoniously onto the graffitied and duck-taped couch, then bent down to study her face.

She could see him growing into focus, slowly. She could feel her breath returning to her. But the Fear stayed.

"Are you okay?" asked Jay slowly, as though worried she might break if he spoke to loudly.

"I…I…" started Evie, feeling a little to weak still to finish her sentence.

Carlos came closer to the couch. Evie took a deep breath.

"I think so. Having you two here…it's helping. It makes me feel more safe. But, being in this old place…all the memories. It's scary."

Sudden understanding dawned on both the boy's faces.

"I didn't know you felt that way," said Jay.

"Yeah, I didn't notice at all. I thought this was just a quick pit stop; I wasn't really thinking how it might be…for you…" Carlos looked nervous.

"But what if it's not a quick pit stop!" exploded Evie. All of the worry, pain, and rage seemed to be boiling out of her. "What if we get stuck here somehow? What if we can never truly leave? Why does it keep pulling us back? Why would Mal even think of returning here. after…after…" Evie ended her sentence in a sob.

Carlos and Jay looked concerned. In a steadier voice, Evie continued.

"This place stole so much from us. It held us, tortured us, and changed us." She turned to Jay "You, me, and Mal. It changed so much. And Carlos" she turned to him "you were so young, you were so out of place…even when we never knew anything better. You were always the kind soul, forced into the rough mold. We tried to force you into this being you could never be; tried to corrupt you. Who knows how far we would have gotten if we hadn't been given a" she gulped. "A chance. We were given a chance; now what if that just goes away?"

They were all quiet for a moment. Then Jay spoke in his deep voice that always seemed to carry a reassuring note in it, no matter how dire situations got.

"It won't be taken away from us. We'll get off this Island right away. We'll go back to Auradon. And we'll have Mal."

"And yeah, all that stuff about you guys before," jumped in Carlos. "You were doing what you had to do to survive. And you were teaching me to survive. You weren't corrupting me; that was our parents. You taught me how to steal and cheat and lie, but that was all to live."

"we all did what we had to do to survive," agreed Jay.

"But that's all behind us now. We're different people. And we know how to be good. You can't keep running from a past you that doesn't exist anymore."

Evie smiled at his calm words. For such a little guy, he seemed very mature.

Just that moment, Ben walked back into the room. He looked disinherited, and in shock.

"Hey buddy! How'd it go? Where's Mal?" asked Jay exuberantly.

"She's not coming," said Ben, sounding like he didn't quite believe his own words.

"What?" exclaimed Evie, jumping off the couch with more force then necessary. She felt as little woozy at first, but she pushed away Jay's helping hand and steadied herself.

"She said she wouldn't come" repeated Ben. "That she didn't belong…"

"Mal doesn't understand the chance she's been given and the freedom she has now. She has to come. I'm going to go talk her out of this made escape she thinks she's making."

And before anyone could stop her, Evie stomped her way up the stairs and marched into the old room which Mal was currently defacing with spray paint. Not that there was much there to deface, anyway.

"Mal, what are you thinking?"

"I'm thinking I need my space!" exclaimed Mal. "I'm thinking you all need to leave me alone!"

Mal spun to her friend with defiance written across her face. Evie could recognize her pain, so similar to the faces she used to wear back when they lived here with their parents. Evie mentally kicked herself for not realizing her friend's pain and turmoil earlier.

Evie took a deep breath and stepped closer to her friend.

"Mal, you know me. You've always been there for me. When my mom used to mock me for my figure and force me into her bidding; you were there to comfort me. When the Isle boys thought they could use me as a plaything, you where there to help me get revenge. You've been there with me every step of the way during our time here on the Isle. Please don't leave me now that we've finally got a chance to do something good."

"But I don't want that chance! I can't do anything right! I'm not made for the good world, Evie." tears were streaming down Mal's face now. Evie felt the pricking feeling behind her eyes as well.

"You are Mal, you are. You were pushed into more of a stressful position then us because unlike you, the rest of us weren't able to attract the eye of royalty."

Mal laughed a bit.

"And I'm sorry I didn't see that sooner. But I promise I will be there for you from now on. You were always there for me. Let me be there for you. Let me help you with this transition. Maybe you weren't meant for Ben, maybe you weren't meant to be a queen. But I know you're meant to be a good person, and I know this is your chance. Such a change isn't as easy on all of us as it was for Carlos, and for you especially. Some of us have pain and doubt to far within ourselves to reject it in only a year." Evie paused and knew the words she was speaking were the truth for both her and Mal. "But I know you were meant for the good world, as well as me and Jay and Carlos. I know you can make it work. And I know we can get through this. Because we are best friends. And best friends are there for eachother always."

She knew as she said it that the words were true. They had overcome so much together; their friendship could help them overcome all.

Mal rushed forward and grasped her friend in a hug. Evie hugged back. They had done it countless of times before. They could do it again.


End file.
